Thursday, April 25, 2019

A tribute to sisters

She just needed to  flash her radiant smile which would  reassure, soothe and inject a large dose of optimism and  rationality in  situations that were totally despondent and frustrating. Aggression, anger, helplessness, trigger impulsive reactions with repercussions that one can regret at leisure. We both were temperamentally diametrically opposite.  I was the typical, fun loving, casual, devil may care teenager given in to rashness, bravado, excitement and adventure. She was the quiet, controlled serene types, never inclined to excesses of any sort.   She was one of the only two people who could tame my unreasonable, spontaneous outbursts of irrational indulgences. The other being my father, whose larger than life, towering personality really petrified me. She was always very  neat and tidy, which made my wild and random ways really intolerable to mom. My text books, my uniforms were always ripped, and every morning, my mother had to stitch some of those rents in my uniform, amidst other chores like packing the lunch box. My activities were chaotic, whilst she was highly organised in getting her act together. I'm sure my mom must have seriously questioned Mendelian Genetics, seeing the gross disparity between her two offsprings.
     Our dining table was the first arena, where she locked horns with dad. My father was an erudite, polished, highly placed executive, who would let his hair down when devouring his favorite curry rice, cooked to perfection by my mother. He would sink his hands into that irresistible potion and use his palm as well to churn the rice with the curry. He would then on occasion, tilt the plate to fill his cupped hand and wolf that conjugal union of curry and rice. She would cast a disapproving look at him, which charged the atmosphere with an unpleasant, uncomfortable tension. My father would grimace, sulk, and sheepishly mend his demeanor adopting more civil means of consuming his favorite meal.
It was then, that my respect and awe for her quadrupled. She was reigning in a bucking , aggressive stallion with just a cold, restraining stare. It revealed a very  potent and yet silent,non-combative approach to tame even the mightiest of them all. She was never the one to indulge in cosmetic extravagances of any kind, and yet had a personality, that would stand out and announce itself without much ado.
There was a subtle, stoic lining to her  warmth and affection, that restricted melodrama of any kind. Her care, her affection, her concern, was like a steady flame, that glowed unobtrusively and unflinchingly.  She had a great sense of humor.  Some clowning act of mine,or a faux pass on my side, and she would break into an uncontrolled laughter rising in crescendo, producing notes  that would give even an accomplished soprano, a complex.
Very early on, I had realized, this girl has been blessed with a touch of divinity. She was fun loving, and yet very calm, measured and balanced. Never prone to any excesses of emotion, and yet very sensitive and compassionate.
She was also blessed with  highly creative abilities and above all, with a virtue that's totally lacking in me. Patience. Her kalamkari paintings, her extraordinary lamps, handicrafts, stained glass, had back breaking detailing, that mandated hours of painstaking handiwork. Incredibly, she would work on it for hours. I would give her admiring glances, and at the same time, curse the  unequal distribution of this all important virtue. She could just be at anything, and her patience would wear down the most intimidating task. And then I realized, in the course of time, that her patience was laced with resilience. A resilience, that was  relentless. She went through a lot of trying situations in her own life, and yet remained stable and unfazed. Adversity  brought out the best in her. She begins the day at the crack of dawn, and finishes off with all the cooking. She then has the time to get to her creative best, as she churns out an array of artwork rather prolifically. She has remained the 'Go to' figure in my own personal trials and tribulations. Her mere presence gave me a sense of calm and  composure. Even without exchanging a word, her silence and radiance would mitigate the most intimidating circumstances. She wielded a silent power, a stoic bearing, that empowered. Her presence reassured, and was like an emotional balm, that comforted and healed the wounds of existential battles. Her demeanor and approach assuaged and soothed ruffled feathers which  made the 'This too shall pass ' that much more bearable. She never let emotional  effervescence drown pragmatism and rationality. She has a maturity, that forgives, and yet a very sharp sense of  fairness, that ensured that she was not taken for granted. Very rarely have I seen her drop her guard.  The script of her life underlined a profound truth-  Circumstances can never defeat. Our improper attitude, our surrender, our lack of faith in ourselves are the recipe of failure. She had a great ability to carry on undaunted and unfazed. She was blessed with an ability to repose faith. She  makes an annual trip to paint and decorate the idol of a Goddess ( Devi) in Thane. Her devotion and worship is of a very high order. A post graduate in Microbiology, she is an academician, and yet a devout believer in a benedictory power.  She probably doesn't realise, that I don't need to travel too far for a tryst with my Devi. She is herself a 'Devi', an eclectic mix of virtues, whose benevolence and divinity has resurrected the lives of all those who had the good fortune of crossing her path.
May your divinity serve as a guiding light for me and help me dispel the intemperance that plagues my countenance.

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