Despair and dejection are among the most common negative emotions that we have to deal with in our daily lives. . These emotions arise as a result of our own judgemental approach. We all have an in-built judicial system that conducts its own trials. The act of prosecution begins as soon as something unfavourable happens or when our ego gets hurt. There are usually one of four verdicts that are passed.
1) I am ok, you are not ok
2) I am not ok, you are ok
3) I am not ok and you are not ok either
4) I am ok, you are ok.
The ‘you’ in this verdict could be a person, a situation, an event, the planetary position, practically just anything outside of the self.
The people whose internal jury deliver the first verdict are typically egoistic, not introspective, rigid, and also slow learners. They are very confident but largely self indulgent and not easily amenable to suggestions. They may also be control freaks and are invariably complaining about most issues and people. They can be intimidating at times and very haughty. They are quite creative and innovative and they remain in a positive state of mind even after an occasional setback.
The individuals whose internal jury deliver the second verdict are the ones who are low on self-confidence. They are the ones who will introspect for hours, and are often more inclined toward some kind of persecution mania. They will learn from their mistakes as they have the sincere desire to learn. However, they are very prone to having bouts of despair and depression and take much longer to recover from a setback.
The ones in the third category are the pessimists, whose criticism can be annoying to those who are at the receiving end of it. . They just do not seem to find anything right. They could be among the nagging sorts and, often, non-creative. They are the least likely to venture out of their comfort zones for any reason and prefer the confines of whatever security is afforded by their reluctant, self- imposed contentment.
The last category are the ‘Edison’ category. These will never reprimand either themselves or anyone for their failures. They have an indomitable spirit and are very adventurous. They seem to have an inexhaustible appetite for life and could be very creative. They are incredibly positive and are extremely perseverant. However, they can become very egoistic when successful because, innately, they have a very high opinion of themselves.
The most advanced and philosophical are the ones that rise above this fourth category. They are the enlightened ones who never have an internal jury. The internal jury is replaced by an observer who merely observes without getting involved. They are the ones who do not believe in having any ‘doership’. Doership not as in ability to do or act. Doership is the conviction of having the wherewithal to effect the desired outcome of ones action.
Actions are most often directed towards a prefixed objective; the commonest being gratification of the senses or of the ego in some way or the other. The last category comprises of those who are less self-indulgent, more selfless. They set out doing what they have to but accept the outcome without any grudge or judgement irrespective of whether they sought the gratification or did not.
This intrinsic contentment is a state of realisation. Living life without passing a verdict of any sort either on people, circumstances or the self is deliverance from unhappiness and despair.
(This is not meant to be a verdict by the author)
Dr Deepak M Ranade
(The author is a consultant Neurosurgeon- firstname.lastname@example.org